A day of rest!

I think this is the happiest Hump Day EVER for me. "Pour quoi?" you ask.....it's really quite simple...it's because of the silence. As I sit here at my computer the only sounds I hear are the clacks and clicks of the keyboard as I pound away and the gurgling of the lizard's water bowl. (Yes, we have a lizard. His (or her...can't quite tell) name is Spike and he/she lives in a terrarium that sits beside the computer. Interesting creature....but not that cuddly!) No shrieks of 'Mom!', no nose blowing, no coughing, no high pitched squeals of morning cartoons. Nothing. Spike and I are sitting here in silence enjoying each others company.



For the past two weeks my house has been turned into an infirmary. I have been administering medicines, rubbing chests and backs with Vics, boiling soup, wiping noses and taking temperatures. Every year, as soon as school starts, I can always count on my kiddies to bring home some sort of flu or cold virus. This year though thoughts of H1N1 seem to trump worries of head lice and packing a peanut-free lunch. We washed our hands, we sanitized, we coughed into our sleeves.....but the flu virus still came for a 'sleep over' at our house. Plenty of rest, medicine every 4 hours, mom's famous 'homemade chicken noodle soup right out of the can' and tonnes of snuggling on the couch...and voila.... a week and a half later we are almost, sort of, not quite back to our normal disease free selves! This is the fist day in 11 days that I am not at home nursing someone back to health. Having said that......I am off to take a glorious 4 hour nap! Taking care of my three chitlans and my hubby-licious (who, when sick, is a bigger baby than a 3 year old toddler!) has wiped me out! I am going to take advantage of this silent, empty house and curl up on the couch, sleep, and hopefully dream of being served nachos by a handsome cabana boy in some tropical far-away place!

I'm not signing up for that!

I have always been a 'big girl'. It's no secret. Whether you catch me from the front or the back there ain't no hiding it.....I'm pleasantly plump!

I have curves, rolls and cellulite dimples. After 30 years of struggling and yo-yoing with my weight I finally came to the conclusion that I am happy with myself the way I am and should stop comparing my body to those of super-models. Of course I would like to loose a few pounds, but no longer desire to be a teeny size 2.

A while back I drove past a gym and thought "why not? Exercise could be fun....it always looks fun on tv!" so I walked in with full intentions of joining. Since I had never looked into joining a gym before I had no idea what to expect. I figured I would go in there and pay a small fee and be able to begin sweating to the oldies that very same day. I probably could have started my exercise regime that very day....that's not the part of the scenario that I had problems with....it was the 'small fee' part. Jack (the super-buffed herculian that was behind the front desk) informed me that in order to become a member of 'his' gym I had to sign a YEAR long contract and PAY $1500. WHAT?

"What if I don't want to go to the gym for a year?"

"Well, Maam, you don't have to keep coming for a year, but you will have to pay for a year's membership. You still pay even if you quit."

"That's stupid."

"That's our policy maam."

"Can't I just join for, say, three months?"

"Sorry maam, we only have contracts for a year"

"That's stupid...and stop calling me maam."

"Sorry. Don't you think you owe it to yourself to make a commitment to better health?"

"All my pants are 20% jean and 80% spandex....obviously I am not that commited to weightloss. What about that sign you have outside..'Join for a month's trial for $10?' Can't I do that?"

"Oh, you saw that sign. Okay, ya, I can sign you up for a month's trial for only ten dollars"

If I had brought my inhaler I would have smacked him and run! I ended up signing a month long contract for ten dollars...figured it would be a good way for me to see if I would actually use the gym, to see if I could actually get my self into a work-out routine. That one month for ten dollars deal turned out to be the worst idea EVER! Those 30 days ended up costing me TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY DOLLARS AND I gained 15 pounds! They had all this fancy equipment but the only machine I knew how to use was the snack machine...and peanut butter cups in that thing cost THREE DOLLARS!

I won't be joining another gym anytime soon, perhaps I'll start a walking routine on my own, or maybe buy a yoga tape and do it in my living room, or become a vegitarian......maybe. For now...I'm quite happy in my spandex jeans....at least for today.....you never know about tomorrow though!

Do not disturb

Today is one of those lazy, wanna nap all day, why bother getting dressed, gonna microwave everyone's dinner days. The sky is grey, the rain is falling periodically and the five people that live in this house have all gone in separate directions.

There are tonnes of things I SHOULD be doing. Laundry, cleaning the bathrooms, updating photo albums, writing a new joke or two. But alas, I am doing not one single thing on my ever-growing 'to do list'. I probably should feel a wee bit guilty about that. Probably should. But I don't. Does that make me a bad person, a bad mom? Who knows? I should take the time to think about that but that would require using too much energy. I'll contemplate all that tomorrow. Maybe.

It's a peaceful day.
A lazy day.
A good day for a nap!