Monday, October 6, 2008

When will I be happy?


I have been performing my little heart out. Every weekend until December is booked, which is awesome....I think.

My shows recently have ranged from absolutely fantastic to good....no real stinkers in a while......BUT, am I happy? I did a weekend run at the Prescott, a comedy room in Ottawa. Full room every night, on the roster with some fabulous comedians, my shows went well....but I walked away NOT happy. A year ago I would have been thrilled to receive the responses from the crowd I was getting this past weekend....but instead, I spent the hour driving home telling my self "it could have been better..I couldn't have been better". The crowds laughed, I had applause breaks...but for some reason, while I am on stage, I always seem to focus on that one person in the crowd who is just not digging my material. Why can't I concentrate on the lady to my left wiping tears from her eyes, or the man on my right doubled over holding his sides because he is laughing so much? Perhaps comedy is like crack....you are always searching for that high. The high you had the first time you had to hold your next line because the laughter was so loud.

Why can't I just enjoy a good night filled with laughter and not expect all of them to be 'rockstar great' every time I waddle on stage?

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