I'm sad........get over it already!

Well, a few days ago I performed at Yuk-Yuk's in Ottawa. It was a fairly good sized crowd, but even though most of the seats were occupied, the whole entire row in front of the stage was empty. I really wish they would seat people at that club. It is extremely hard to connect with your audience when they are sitting so far from the stage. I was on tenth out of 14 stand-ups performing. I took the stage, started my routine, and........a few giggles here and there, for some it would have been considered a good set, for me, it was mediocre. I hate silence, so I have my routine set that there is SUPPOSE to be a giggle every 30 secons at least. There were quite a few spots that night where I know there was suppose to be a laugh at there was none. There was laughter, but not a lot. I did not "kill". I suppose I should be happy that there wasn't complete silence but I am my own worst critic. The standards I have for myself are high, and I guess that is something I must work on. I should learn to give myself a break. I did find solace though in the fact that after I left the stage I was approached by a fellow comic who routinely reviews the shows, and rather harshley, and he put his arm around me and said "I think tonight, is the first night you met an audience that was afraid to laugh at your humour. Your punchlines were there, your rythm was there, but your audience just thouht you were too edgy." I thank him for that because he is a brutally honest individual. He definately tells it like he sees it, so I know he wasn't just trying to make me feel better. I have to realize that I will come across audiences that are just not 'into' my humour, and that I will have to realize, is okay. Humour is a personal thing. Everyone has a different sense of humour and not everyone is going to like mine. Does that mean I am not funny? No. I have to remember that! As sad as it is, I just want everyone to love me! LOVE ME! It's like highschool all over again....and once again I am NOT the cool kid!

Summer's here.....ba-hum-bug!

I love my children, I honestly do....I SWEAR! But being with them 24 hours a day for 7 days a week is starting to frazzle my nerves! I am seriously thinking of taking up 'alcohol' as a hobby! They seem to be constantly bored, even though I keep giving them a long list of chores they could be doing to help pass the time, but NO that is not good enough. They want days filled with water-slides, fairs, shopping, cotton candy........hmmm actually that sounds pretty good, but alas, I work for minimum wage and cannot afford a billionaires summer vacation! Perhaps someday, someday but not today. Not even tomorrow. Probably not even this year! So for now, for this summer, my children will continue to be bored, they will continue to bicker with each other, they will continue to drive be absolutely bonkers.....but that is okay because they are growing up way to fast and I know that soon the summer will come when they are gone, out with friends, working...not with their mother. So for now, I may bitch and chew, but I wouldn't want my summer to be any other way then how it is now.....yelling, screaming, fighting__laughing, singing, hugging, sharing!

It's been a long, long while!

Well, I started this blog with the best of intentions. I had originally planned to write in it ALL the time! Ya...that fad quickly died! I have a very low attention span in case you haven't noticed. Once again, though, I am making the resolution to write on this blog ALL the time!

..start laying your bets now.......I give myself 2 weeks and then I will once again neglect to blog! If nothing else, I am predictable!

I sucked big time babeee!

Was just reading over my last post. Well.....that night at Absolute, I had my first "crappy set". It was horrible! The crowd barely laughed, but I kept going on, didn't stop my routine, finished it in record time! There were no laugh breaks, no applause breaks, just the sound of crickets and the beating of my heart. I had never really had a bad night on stage before that night. I guess I was due for one. It is a humbling experience to say the least. All the way home, I contiplated whether or not to continue comedy, I was THAT upset! But the club owner assured me that it was not neccessarily my set that was bad, he said my timing was good, my stage precense was good, my delivery was good, but the audience just wasn't ready. I was up first and the crowd just hadn't had enough time to warm up yet. At least that is what he told me and I am clinging to that! I go up again in a weeks time at Yuk-Yuk's, and am trying to write some new material. It is turning out to HARD, HARD, HARD! I am trying to write a "clean" set, but everything I write about eventually turns into a dick joke! I mean come on, what's funnier than a dick! Well, must go and get supper on the table. Say a prayer for me!

Hi!

I don't really have anything to write, but felt guilty if I didn't at least write a word or two so.....Hi there! No I am done!
I am performing tonight at Absolute Comedy, wish me luck. Have a wee case of the flu, not feeling the best, but am still going to go. I absolutely hate the thought of cancelling. Hard to make a good name for yourself in stand-up if you are known for cancelling!
Jesus loves you and I think you are groovy!

..and so it begins

Well, here I am. What brought here? Frustration? Madness? Anger?

All of the above, plus a whole purse full of other emotions, most brought on by fluctuating hormones. I am the mother of three and a wife of one, and a stand-up comedian. Almost two years ago, I took the stage for the fist time at an Open Mic Comedy Night, and have been doing so again and again and again. I loved it instantly. The lights, the tension, the sound of laughter.

A new year has begun and with it hopes and goals for 2007. I am still an amateur comedian, and had set a personal goal, that this year I would take the next step in my comedy career, work weekends at the club. As an amateur, I only perform on Open Mic nights (Wednesdays) for free. I want some cash! Some moola! Momma needs a new pair of shoes! This, I decided, was going to be the year I took that step.

The year started out excellent! I was asked to perform at a Business Women's Retreat, and for my six minutes of 'bitchen' I recieved $100.00, not bad eh? Eager to get stage time at the clubs, I started making my presence known. Watching others perform and chit chatting with them, I found out that most of those that had started when I had, were already recieving weekend paid gigs. They were also being asked to perform at various showcases. My phone had never rung. I was never contacted. Now, I am NOT saying that I am funnier than the others, but I am saying that I feel I am JUST AS funny. I have made a good name for myself as an amateur. I won Kingston's Comedian Idol 2006 and I was a finalist in Yuk-Yuk's Great Canadian Laugh Off. These are both honorable feats. So what gives? Why was I not considered funny by the club owners? So....I called them up. The first fellow told me that I was too dirty! TOO DIRTY! I was informed that people who came to clubs and paid good money to get in wanted to see class, wanted clean humour, so unless I cleaned up my dirty little act, I would not recieve paid stage time. The second fellow (there are two clubs in Ottawa) was much kinder. He promised that he would watch me perform a few times and if I consistantly gave him a good show, then he would definately help me get to the next step. He said dirty is alright, as long as it is not too overwhelming, and with my routine, I ease into the "dirty" material, it really doesn't get smutty until the end. Comedy, unfortunately, is a little biased. Men can be dirty, smutty and raunchy, where as vulgarities are much less accepted when coming from a female comics mouth.

So, long story short, that is how I got here and why. I figure if I have a place I can write daily, it will help me to get those creative juices flowing. Let's see. If you have a chance, watch a wee video of my act and let me know what you think. www.myspace.com/iamericascott or http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eIMRETSIH4U Am I a dirty little housewife or just a woman who says it like it is?